Theros Ironfeld VS Ash

This Rumble ended on 2002-09-30 00:00:00.0.

Theros Ironfeld

95 Votes

Tell-tale feature: Metallic arm of pure silver, Michael Clarke Duncan physic.
Favorite Quote: "I bring you - the DragonLance!"
Greatest Assets: Biceps the size of Palanthas and the fabled Silver Arm or Ergoth
Greatest Weakness: Requires a lube job for his arm every 2,000 miles.
Favorite Weapon: "Excuse me while I whip this out." The first dragonlance ever forged by Theros in 352 AC. Sixteen feet of pure Dragonsilver named "Ethel".
Fighting Style: Minotaur bull charge.
Finishing Maneuver: Strong arm of the divine.


78 Votes

Tell-tale features: Missing hand, giant chin.
Favorite Quote: "Hail to the King Baby"
Greatest Assets: Ability to make snide one-liners and drive his enemy into a frenzy (similar to the kender ability to taunt) and assembling prosthetics out of
spare tools and scrap pieces of armor.
Greatest Weakness: Can't remember proper incantations.
Favorite Weapon: His boom stick, S-Marts top-of-the-line, it's a 12 gauge, double-barreled Remington. That sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids Michigan,
it's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger.
Fighting Style: Good old fashioned improvisational "save my butt" street fighting
Finishing Maneuver: The Off-the-Top-Rope Chin Dive of Doom

Pre-fight interview with Rumble correspondent Orionthalas Tarrasqueslayer

OT: Ash, how do you plan to defeat the greatest hero in Krynnish history?
Ash: Well, to be honest I haven't really given it much thought. I'd have to say that I'd lead off by bringing in a Deadite, killing it, and then launching
into my famous "Who wants some?" speech and intimidating him. After that, I guess I'll have to fall back on my shotgun.
OT: Umm, I don't think that your "boom stick" will be allowed by the referee.
Ash: Hmmm, well, what the ref don't know won't kill him unless he gets in my way.
OT: My lips are sealed Ash. But, for arguments sake, lets pretend you ran out of shells.
Ash: I see. Well, I'd have to go to my almost reliable chainsaw. If that thing doesn't bother starting for me I'll whip out my cyborg-like hand that I snagged off an old piece of armor.
OT: What of your finishing move Ash? Any plans on how you'll execute it if the opportunity presents itself?
Ash: What do you mean "if" baby? You're talking to the man who defeated an evil version of himself and is standing here right now looking at your pointy-eared
face. Could you defeat an evil pointy-eared freak version of yourself, Mister Fancy-pants? Hmmmm? I didn't think so. Now get out of my face before I rip
off those pointy little ears and use them for toothpicks.

OT: Theros Ironfeld, can you give us a little preview of what's to come in this battle?
Theros: Sure, I've been studying that "boom stick" of his and a think I can ring the barrel with old "Ethel"
OT: Are you talking about throwing a sixteen foot mounted dragonlance?!?
Theros: Of course. Why? Have you ever seen the Whitestone before? I split that baby in two from 200 paces with a strong wind coming up out of the east.
OT: Ok so lets say you disable that with the DragonLance, then what?
Theros: I'll have to whip out Fred.
OT: Fred? Who or what is that?
Theros: This is Fred pulls out a Hammer.
OT: By the gods! That's the Hammer of Kharas! How did you get that?
Theros: Let's just say I have friends in low places... now where the hell is my money pouch... damn thief.
OT: Well it sounds like you both have things well in hand... uhmm.. I mean you will handle the... I mean good luck... *slips away*

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